Simple way to show others how to interact with you
Clear relationships come from clear expectations. When people understand your ethics, boundaries, preferences, and communication style, your interactions with them become easier, calmer, and more constructive.
A Personal User Manual (PUM) helps you define these parts of yourself in writing. The process gives you clarity about how you operate and how you prefer others to engage with you. Reviewing it periodically keeps it active in your mind.
You can share this manual with people who matter to you — close friends, family members, business partners, or a romantic partner. Sharing it gives them a clear understanding of how to interact with you, and their response can help you understand how aligned they are with your values and expectations.
Your manual can be written as lists or in more detail. The goal is clarity, not formality. You can present it casually or directly, and you can invite questions or conversation after they’ve read it.
Your Personal User Manual might include:
- Ethics
- Philosophical views
- Political or spiritual beliefs
- Communication style
- Friendship boundaries
- Partnership boundaries
- Relationship boundaries
- Romantic boundaries
- Preferred environments
- Disliked environments
Reviewing your manual periodically helps keep it relevant as your life evolves.
Personal User Manual (PUM) – Download
The download includes a Microsoft Word template and a PDF example. After adding your information, you can save it as a PDF to share digitally or print a copy for offline use.
Get a copy here: Personal User Manual (PUM)
Use: Close friends, family members, and business partners
Format: Microsoft Word & PDF